Emotions

It has been a hectic 3 months.

On 28th July I became a grandfather for the first time when the beautiful Brooke Laverick came into the world. Sadly it was a week before I could meet her, as I’d had a throat infection, so stayed away.

Then on 18th July my mother passed away in her sleep. The funeral was on the 30th.

Finally on 15th October my Son Matthew got married to Lois. A good day which as a consequence I turned up to church the next day slightly hung over. (Drinking alcohol at a wedding feast? I don;t think Jesus would have disapproved.

But it has been an emotional 3 months. All three major life events condenced into a short time frame. In that time I do not think there has been an emotion I have not experienced. From pure joy to utter despair via laughter, sadness and depression I have been there. And back.

Anticipation:

The waiting is almost over. Our daughter has been compaining of discomfort in the later stages of pregnancy. But the waiting seems longer as an expectant grandparent the wait seems to have dragged out longer than it was as an expectant father all those years ago. Does time filter out the boring bits and make the past seem shorter?

Frustration:

Labour, then the child is born, and I am off work with an infection. The happiness of becoming a grandfather is tempered with the frustration of not being able to meet your new granddaughter, especially the first one. Who would not want to meet their grandchild as soon as possible.

Delight:

Delight as I meet the young Brooke. I get to hold her. She sleeps most of the time. Other visits are better, she is awake longer.

A few happy weeks later the mood is changed. To what I have no idea.

18th September,

Linda and I are about to leave for church when we got a phone call from the nursing home.  Linda went up there, I went to get Dad, who could not be contacted because he’d already left for church. A small number of family members gathered at the nursing home. Many cried. I didn’t, I was mentally numb. I had done such a good job pushing my emotions down that I couldn’t get them back.

Two days later I could do nothing, the lethargy that comes with feeling depressed. Fortunately this soon passed. But it was another week before I cried. And again at the funeral. Grief is nothing

15th October.

Another change and a very good day. Congratulations to My son and daughter in law. Emotions were again mixed, but this time happiness, love and pride.

 

 

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